'Silly humour' can help defuse
rage in a number of ways. For one thing, it can help you get
a more balanced perspective. When you get angry and call someone
a name or refer to them in some imaginative phrase, stop and
picture what that word would literally look like. If you're
at work and you want to call a co-worker a 'dirt-bag' or a 'single-cell
life form,' for example, picture a large bag full of dirt, or
an amoeba, sitting at your colleague’s desk, talking on
the phone, and going to meetings. Do this whenever you want
to call another person by a rude name. If you can, draw a picture
of what the actual thing might look like. This will take a lot
of the edge off your fury; and humor can often be relied on
to help un-knot a tense situation.
The underlying message of highly
angry people is 'Things ought to go my way!' Angry people tend
to feel that they are morally correct, that anything blocking
or changing their plans is an unbearable indignity that they
should NOT have to tolerate. Maybe other people do, but not
them.
When you catch yourself feeling
that way, picture yourself as a god or goddess, a supreme ruler
who owns the streets and stores and office space, striding alone
and having your way in all situations while others defer to
you. The more detail you can get into your imaginary scenes,
the more chance you have to realize that maybe you are being
a little unreasonable; you'll also realize how unimportant the
things you're angry about really are.
There are two cautions in using
humor. First, don't try to just 'laugh off' your problems; rather,
use humor to help yourself face them more constructively. Second,
don't give in to harsh, sarcastic humor; that's just another
form of unhealthy aggression. What these techniques have in
common is a refusal to take yourself too seriously. Anger is
a serious emotion, but it's often accompanied by ideas that,
if examined, can make you laugh.
For professional assistance
with anger management please call Wellnet on 084 944 9444 and
a consultant will refer you to a counselor in your area.
